22

Sunday the 9th December was officially my 22nd birthday! I thought I'd tell you a bit about what I got up to and show you a few of the lovely presents I got.

First thing was a night out on Friday with my friends. Sadly not everyone could make it but I had a really amazing time with the people who could. I had a LOT to drink and had such a laugh. It was one of the best nights out I've ever had. I also managed to wear a dress I couldn't do up a month ago thanks to my weight loss so far (which is now a whole stone). 

On my actual birthday I had my family over and I opened presents and had tea and cakes. I got so many amazing things and it was so nice to spend time with my family. I also got a bit of money which I'm going to try to put towards a new phone but I'm a bit broke right now so it may have to go towards other things like new work shoes.

From my parents I got the Urban Decay Naked Cherry palette which I have wanted since it came out. All the shades are so pretty and I am happy to add it to my collection of Naked palettes. I used it on my birthday to do my eyeshadow and I am in love with it.

This was an extra present from my parents because of how well I've done with getting a job and everything, they are really proud of me. The perfume has a really beautiful quote on the front which is shown in the photo above. When they gave me this I actually cried.

This pretty bracelet was a gift from my sister which I actually picked out a couple of months ago when we were on holiday and I love it so much. I wish I could show you all the gifts I got but there's a lot more and it would take too long to take photos of them all.

I'm feeling very blessed at 22 and I am excited to see what this year holds for me. Thank you to everyone who made my birthday special, I love you all.

- Claire

My Weightloss Journey So Far

This is quite a controversial subject to discuss, but about 3 weeks ago I joined Weight Watchers, sorry WW as they have now been rebranded. I had been struggling with my weight for years and although I wasn't that unhealthy or at risk I just wasn't happy with the way I looked. So I decided I wanted to lose weight.

In the first week I lost 5lbs and that's probably more because you lose more weight in the first week of a diet. It was tough because I was used to just eating what I want when I want and I had to start tracking everything and due to the amount of points I was having much healthier food.

Luckily there are lots of zero point foods, such as fruit, vegetables, chicken, turkey, eggs and fish. So I've been having a lot of those. WW have lots of their own brand food like the soup and bruschetta pictures above. I use the app to track my food and its full of recipes and you can scan the barcode on your food to find out the points. You are also given weekly points which are extra points you can delve into if you need to so it doesn't restrict you from going out or having something nice. 

In week 2 I lost 3lbs which I was really happy with. I got my pedometer to help count my steps more accurately than my phone. I started trying to get to 10,000 steps a day, although this doesn't always happen sadly. I am doing the diet with my mum so we've been helping and encouraging each other and she's been doing recipes. I've also eaten so much more fruit on this diet because it isn't any points and I find myself looking at food and thinking, I bet that would be a lot of points.

I got my first (and only because they will no longer be doing certificates) certificate for losing half a stone just two weeks into the diet which I am so proud of and I now have it on my wall to encourage me. In week 3 I lost 2lbs which was good but I feel I could have done better because I hadn't done enough exercise that week. 

So far I've lost a total of 10lbs in 3 weeks which I'm really proud of. I'm so close to losing 5% of my original weight which is great and I'm hoping that week 4 will get me there. I will probably do another post about this further down the line.

- Claire

November Favourites

Its the end of November and I haven't done one of these posts in a while so I thought I'd make one before I start my new job on Monday. Here are my November favourites. I will add in links to products where I can.

First up is this gorgeous grey bag I got from Whispers Boutique in Taverham. It cost £14.99 and I fell in love with it when I saw it. Its got a zip inside and one outside too and it also does up with a zip. Its got an adjustable strap which is so handy and a really cute fluffy pompom. 

Next up is these gorgeous boots I got from New Look for £19.99. I have worn these so much lately, including to some interviews (including the place that hired me) and they are so comfy and stylish. I think its nice to have a pair of boots that aren't black or brown. They are currently in the sale on the New Look website for £14.99, here is the link.

I picked up this cute hat from Primark for maybe £3.99 (don't quote me on that though I lost the receipt). Its so soft and keeps my head warm in these cold months. It looks so cute and I love the colour. It was cheap and I would highly recommend it.

Next is this Ted Baker Body Spray in Pretty Pearl. I got a small bottle of this last year around Christmas for myself in the 3 for 2 at Boots and I fell in love with the smell of it so when I ran out I had to get some more. I think it was £8 from Boots but is also in their 3 for 2 this year as well, here is the link.

I won these amazing tweezers on Instagram recently and I am in love with them. They are the Tweezerman Rose Gold Slant Tweezer. They allow precision and are in a gorgeous rose gold colour. I got mine from Tweezerman but they don't sell products on their site so here is a link to them at Boots.

- Claire

Things Get Better

Todays post is going to be a bit different to what I normally post. Its going to be more personal. I will be talking about mental health, mine specifically, so if you do not wish to read about that then I suggest you move along.

Since I was about 10/11 I have suffered with depression and anxiety. I was bullied in school and it affected my self esteem a lot and I remember sitting in the classroom during breaktimes because the other kids would call me names and avoid me. I know a lot of kids probably suffered worse than me with bullying, but everyone who experiences it gets affected by it.

I was lucky enough in high school to find a really amazing group of friends, who I'm still friends with to this day. But sadly the depression and anxiety were not going tot just go away and I would never raise my hand in class and I hated presenting in front of the class. It was I think the first year of high school when I started self-harming.

I somehow managed to get through high school with decent grades and great friends, but when I started sixth form for some reason things seemed to get worse. I couldn't concentrate on my work, I had no self esteem, I felt like a failure because I wasn't doing well in my subjects and by the end of the first year I dropped out.

After I dropped out of sixth form I found myself with no motivation at all. I didn't want to get out of bed in the morning, I barely went out at all. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety during this time and got given anti-depressants by my doctor. I was on job seekers as I had no money and I needed it for my parents to help them pay for my food and what not. So I applied for some jobs, forcing myself into social situations I wasn't ready for, making my mental health even worse.

At one point I applied for an apprenticeship and this somehow put me on a company's radar that help people find apprenticeships. So I had to meet with this woman and she asked me what I wanted to do and at the time I wanted to work with animals so that's what I told her and she said "that's unrealistic" and made me apply for things I didn't and couldn't do. This resulted in me going to a trial at a job that made me physically sick from the anxiety. Yet this woman persisted and one day I found myself trying to get ready for an interview and panicking and feeling scared and hopeless. Self-harm was still a coping mechanism for me so I turned to that to try to help myself, but when that didn't work I went for pills instead and just kept taking them till my dad found me in the bathroom.

After this suicide attempt I finally received some help. A really nice woman helped me a lot with my anxiety and got me out and about. The only problem was the depression wasn't treated and so when several bad things happened within a few days of each other I took another overdose.

I was put on a waiting list to see someone, then when I did I was put on an online course, which honestly wasn't that helpful. However, I took it upon myself to try to make myself better. I bought books, I used google and apps to find exercises to help the depression. I made myself go out and do things I enjoy. And it may have taken a while, and I'm still improving even now, but things have become so much better for me lately.

This year was full of some really bad experiences, breakups and worries. But I overcame them, I kept going. Yesterday I was employed for my first proper job and everything in my life is finally going well. I had lots of people doubt me and abandon me because of my struggles, but I have proved I am capable and I am better than I was. I am so grateful to all the people who did support me through it and I will continue to improve myself and my life.

- Claire

Lucky Girl

Hey, its been a while again but I have been super busy and ill so I've just not had time to upload any posts. Today I was finally feeling up to and able to write a post. So I thought I'd tell you about an amazing giveaway I won recently and show you what I won as I'm really happy and thankful for it.

It was a giveaway held by Unicorn Cosmetics and Jewellery Box. I won through Instagram and I was so surprised when they contacted me. The prize included 5 items which I will tell you more about.

I really liked how nicely it was all presented and it arrived really quick. There was a note inside congratulating me which wad a really nice touch.

There was a lovely set of eye makeup brushes which came in a case which is not pictured here. These were from Unicorn cosmetics and as you can see the handles are like unicorn horns. The brushes are so pretty and soft. I cant wait to use them.

This 9ct gold unicorn necklace is from Jewellery Box and I love it. It is dainty and it shines in the light and its the perfect length. The unicorn is so cute and doesn't look tacky, I will be wearing this a lot.

There were 2 pairs of lashes from Unicorn Cosmetics. The top ones are Forget Me Not and the other ones are Unicorn Flutter. They are both so pretty and look like such great quality. The packaging is so cute and I cant wait to try them out.

Finally a Glitter Skin pot from Unicorn Cosmetics. This glitter is in a wonderful shade of gold and will be perfect for NYE parties. The pot itself is also really cute and I'm very excited to have some fun with this.

If you like the look of any of these products or would just like to look at the websites, click here for Unicorn Cosmetics and here for Jewellery Box.

- Claire

What I've Been Up To

It has been a while since I made a blog post, I've just been unmotivated to write one. But today I found the motivation and figured I would tell you about some of the things I've been up to lately.

Here we have my dog, Ellie, in Wymondham with Henry the Hare. This was taken on a day out with my mum and my grandparents when the weather had finally cooled down enough for us to take Ellie with us out for the day.

This was on a night out, while we were at Spoons. It was such a fun night with my friends and the gin was great. Me and my friend Lish love to take a good toilet selfie on a night out.

I took my mum out to a Harry Potter afternoon tea for her birthday. The food was amazing and they were playing music from the films. We had to pose in front of the Hagrid cake as well because it looked so good.

We went out on my mum's 50th birthday to a seaside town. It was a really nice day out and my mum had a lot of people wish her happy birthday thanks to the sash I got her. It was me, my mum, my dad and my sister and we had ice cream and went in a lot of shops. I even won something for my boyfriend on a 2p machine.

One day my boyfriend, Sam, and I went all the way to Wakefield by train so he could buy a guitar he really wanted. It was a fun but tiring day, it was worth it to see how happy he was with the guitar though. 

I went to the zoo with my family and Sam which was lots of fun. We saw the tigers being fed and had lunch outside as it was such a nice day. 

This wonderful photo (technically Emma's second of the day) that Emily took was during tea and cakes with my friends. It was a nice time, we got to see Lish before she went off to America for her holiday. 

- Claire

Book Haul

I have bought several second hand books this month which I shouldn't really have done because I have so many already. So of course I thought I'd share what I got with you. All of these books were from charity shops and were really cheap.

First up is Paris For One And Other Stories by Jojo Moyes. I saw this in hardback in a charity shop and I could not resist getting it, short stories are so great for me when I get in a reading slump and I have heard nothing but great things about Jojo Moyes. It is full of stories about strong, relatable women so I'm really excited to read it. 

Then there's Perfect by Cecelia Ahern.This is the sequel to Flawed which I haven't actually read yet but when I saw this in hardback I had to get it. I'm really excited to reads these young adult books, I have collected a lot of Cecelia Ahern's books. Its about a girl who lives in a society that demands perfection and sounds right up my street.

Next is Lullaby and Wake by Amanda Hocking. I saw these two in a charity shop and its about three new girls in town who are not quite what they seem. I don't know much about this series but they seem really interesting.

Foretold and Forgiven are both books from The Demon Trappers series by Jana Oliver. What I didn't realise when I picked these up is that they are the 3rd and 4th books of a series. I got them because they sounded like the perfect kind of fantasy books I would love but now I have to hunt for the first 2 first.

I had to pick up A Dance With Dragons 2: After The Feast by George R.R. Martin because it was the only book of the Game Of Thrones series I didn't own. I got all but one of the books from the series from a charity shop.

Next is Ink And Bone by Rachel Caine. Rachel Caine is the author of the Morganville Vampires series which I have read a couple of books from (so far) so I knew I liked her writing. It is the first book of The Great Library series which I'm sure is going to be another fantasy series I will love.

Finally, The Iron Witch by Karen Mahoney. It is about a girl who has powerful magic that she tries to hide until the dark exiles of Faerie come along and she has to make a choice. It is a typical fantasy with a strong female lead which is my weakness.

- Claire

Updates On My Life

Hey, so I haven't posted much lately and I wanted to tell you why and give you some quick updates on what's been going on in my life.

I guess I'll start with the negatives and get them out of the way first. So a couple of months back I went through a break up and that was really hard on me. I was with him for over a year and I didn't see it coming. But I am doing so much better now because of the way he ended things he made it really easy to move on from him.

I also had stuff going on with family being ill and my great uncle passing away. My mum was in hospital a few weeks back and may have to have an operation. My dog broke her toe and has been on so many trips to the vets about it and we are reaching the limit of the insurance so that's been pretty stressful.

I had an interview for a job but I didn't get it, although I'm not that mad because it wasn't set hours or days so it would have been really awkward.

Onto the good things. I met a guy and although its still early days I like him a lot. It has been nice to go out and see him and he's American so that's pretty cool too.

I have been out with my friends quite a bit over the past couple months which has been really nice. I even had my first night out in months on Friday and one of my friends is back from Uni and I'm really glad about it.

Everything in my life at the moment seems to be either going really well or really bad, its a bit of a rollercoaster.

- Claire

Wordy Wednesday

So I kind of want to start this new thing on my blog where I post something I've written, whether that be a poem or a short story, on a Wednesday. I've always loved writing, although I'm not great at it I thought I'd try out posting some on here just to see how it goes. A lot of it is utter rubbish to be honest but its a really good outlet and hobby for me. I may or may not continue these types of posts. Today's will be a badly written poem so enjoy.

How much am I worth?

I count my worth

In the number of guys who want to fuck me

In the number of people who like me

In the number of times I’ve had sex

I count my worth

In the number of people I’ve wronged

In the number of drinks I’ve had tonight

In the number of people who envy me

I count my worth

In the number of poems I write

In the number of things I’ve failed at

In the number of people I’ve hurt

I count my worth

In the number of scars on my thighs

In the number of times I’ve been rejected

In the number of people who actually care

- Claire

Birchbox March 2018

I recently decided to treat myself to a Birchbox since there was £5 off your first box. Its been a while since I made a post, I've had some personal things going on that has stopped me from posting recently. But I'm back and I hope you enjoy this post.

First up is a full size Rituals product, the Ritual of Sakura Foaming Shower Gel (RRP from £4.50). This shower gel is infused with cherry blossom and organic rice milk to sooth your skin. Its hydrating as well which is great for my dry skin. 

Next is a Spectrum Collections B04 Angled Blender Brush (RRP £5.99). The soft angle is perfect for blending eyeshadow into the outer corners of your eyes and along the crease. These brushes are so soft and also animal friendly. 

This is the Pro Blo Group MaskMe Hydrating Hair Mask, a Birchbox exclusive (RRP £8 for a pack of 4). It makes your hair shiny as if you've been to the salon and has protective antioxidants to protect your hair from heat damage.

I love the Blaq Peel Off Mask (RRP £14 for full size). I have used this product before, it helps unblock pores and purifies your skin. Its always really fun to peel off afterwards and lasts a long time even a small tube.

Finally, the Benefit BADgal Bang! Volumising Mascara (RRP £21.50 for full size). I am so excited for this product! Its is a thickening mascara that gives volume with a brush moulded to catch every lash. I'm a big lover of Benefit so I'm really excited to try this out.

Book Haul

This book haul is lots of books I've collected over the past couple of months but I hadn't posted about them yet so I thought I'd do that now. Its been snowing loads where I live so I've had some time to make this post.

First up is a book I picked up from a charity shop and that it The Book Of Lost Things by John Connolly. This book originally had a library binding cover on it but it was damaged so I removed it. I had heard of this book before which is the main reason I picked it up. As far as I can tell its about a young boy who reads a lot and finds the real world and the fantasy worlds beginning to meld together. My copy is quite damaged so I may have to replace it if I enjoy it a lot. 

The Dark Heroine by Abigail Gibbs was another charity shop find. I think the words "Dinner with a vampire" was what first drew me in. I am a sucker for fantasy book and I love a good vampire novel. It sounds like its about a girl who ends up being drawn into a world of vampires and it sounds like there will be some romance too so I'm excited to read it. 

Next, and the last of the charity shop finds, is White Teeth by Zadie Smith. I also saw her other popular book in the shop but this one appealed to me more. I actually know next to nothing about this book as there's no real blurb on the book but the reviews call it a "funny, generous, big-hearted novel" and I quite like not knowing much about it.

I got King's Cage by Victoria Aveyard which is the 3rd book in the Red Queen series from a shop called the works and it was so cheap for a new book. I recently read Red Queen and I loved it so much so I'm really glad I got this one. I wrote a bit about Red Queen in one of my recent posts so if you want to know more about that then check out that post.

I think I got Heartless by Marissa Meyer from amazon. As I recently finished the Lunar Chronicles I had to get this since I enjoyed her writing so much. It's a retelling about the Queen of Hearts which is all I really needed to know to pick it up as I love retellings. It's about before Alice and before all the Queen's evil ways so I'm really interested in finding out how she is portrayed in this book.

Next is One Of Us Is Lying by Karen M. McManus. I got this because my friend Lish raved about it and made me really want to read it. On the back it says "Five students walk into detention. Only four leave alive." and the mystery has drawn me in. I am so excited to read this book, I love high school, murder and mystery so this is right up my street.

Obviously I got The Cruel Prince by Holly Black which I have read and I love it. It's a YA fantasy about a girl called Jude who ends up living amongst faeries along with her sisters. She's bullied by a prince called Cardan and she just wants to belong. This book is full of dark magic and plot twists and I highly recommend it. 

Next is Everless by Sara Holland. Its set in a world where your life is currency and a girl tries to save her father and herself from running out of time. It sounds so good and reminds me a lot of a film I watched. I really love the concept of this book and I cant wait to read it.

I also got The Language Of Thorns by Leigh Bardugo. I am actually currently reading a book by Leigh Bardugo called Shadow And Bone and I'm really loving it so I'm glad I got this book. Its a collection of six illustrated stories filled with "betrayals, romance and revenge" set in the Grishaverse which is to do with the series I am reading the first book of. I'd like to point out how pretty this book is and how excited I am to read it.

Next is Carve The Mark by Veronica Roth which is another YA fantasy. Its about two young people, Cyra and Akos, who grew up in enemy countries and Akos is kidnapped and forced to serve Cyra. Cyra has the ability to cause pain just with a touch and she's used as a weapon by her brother. Cyra and Akos hate each other but as Akos fights for his survival he discovers Cyra is also fighting for hers. I'm a huge sucker for YA fantasy so of course I got this.

I didn't know much about Scythe by Neal Shusterman when I bought it but the cover appealed to me a lot and so did the description once I read it. Its set in a world where the only way to die is to be gleaned by a professional scythe and Citra and Rowan become apprentices. They have to learn the art of killing and having the responsibility of choosing their victims. Then they are told that one of them will have to glean the other. It sounds right up my street and I'm really excited to read it.

I got Zenith by Sasha Alsberg and Lindsay Cummings! Yes, the main reason I got this is because of Sasha, but it also sounds so amazing. Its another YA fantasy about a girl called Androma who is a powerful mercenary, but she's known to her friends aboard her starship as Andi. When a routine mission goes wrong the crew is tested when they are faced with a bounty hunter from Andi's past. Its got spaceships and a strong, badass female lead so I am super excited about it.

I had to get Stone Cold Touch by Jennifer L. Armentrout, which is the second book in the Dark Elements trilogy. I loved the first book in this series which I received as a gift from my friend Lish (look whos been mentioned twice in one post). I love the characters and any book with demons is a book for me. Its about a girl called Layla whos half demon half gargoyle who can kill someone with a kiss. After the way the first book ended I needed to get the next one and I know I'll be reading it soon.

Finally, A Love Like Blood by Marcus Sedgwick which I picked up new for just £2.99 in hardback! This was such a great find, its a dark, compelling thriller about a man whos life changes when he sees a man apparently drinking the blood of a murdered woman and he sets on his journey to discover the truth. I don't mind if its actually about vampires or just some creep who likes drinking blood, I love a good mystery and I found myself drawn to this book.

That is all for now, it was a fair amount of books. I am trying to cut back on how many I buy which is why these were from the past couple of months, not all bought in one go.

- Claire